Entry for Janie

My mother, Janie, has been through so much in the past eight years, I think she’s forgotten what it’s like to be comfortable–let alone pampered.

 In 2002, Janie was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a double mastectomy/hysterectomy, and several rounds of estrogen-destroying hormone treatments.  She lost her sense of femininity—hormones, womb, and breasts—in one awful year.  The years following that were full of fear about whether or not the cancer was coming back, as well as the huge adjustments in her daily life that she made as she struggled to deal with her new scars, her new appearance, and her new anxieties.  My father tried to urge her to rest during this period, but she still insisted on working to my brother and I—who were just entering college (him) and finishing up high school (me)—financially as we went through our own life changes and transitions.  She tried to be there for us emotionally, too, even though she was undergoing so much.

And then, just when her health seemed to be on an upswing in 2006, my father, to whom my mother had been happily married for over 25 years, was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer.  For three years, my mother acted as his health advocate amidst complicated procedures, a mess of medical expenses, and even frustrating miscommunication between his doctors.  She then carried the family through the sudden changes we had to make financially as his health declined—moving us into a smaller home pretty much single-handedly, since my father was so weak—and then took care of my dad through at-home hospice for several months.  When he died in January of ’09, she didn’t allow the family to fall apart. She managed the family estate and returned to work, making sacrifices to help support me, her youngest, as I left college and began to embark on my own career path.  

 She lives as a widow now at 54.  Her job these days involves helping women with breast cancer to “look normal—or at least as good as they can,” as she puts it, by fitting them with specialty wigs and prostheses.  Every day, she grieves with women over their scars as they try to hide the damage.  Every day, I think she opens up her own old wounds, but she knows that, as a survivor herself, there is no one who can understand the women who come to her for help any better.  In spite of the pain, she puts her heart on the line every day to help others who are going through cancer.  I can’t believe she does it—and I can’t imagine how she manages it, especially since she’s still grieving for my father and all the things she lost in her 25-year romance with him. He was her best friend.

She hasn’t had much time to take care of herself in the year following his death, and I think she’s forgotten what it’s like to be taken care of. Even though I’ve been living with her for the last ten months, she hasn’t ever relinquished her caretaker role to me, and she still takes on the heaviest burdens for herself.  Grief has aged her prematurely—and I know that she would feel much more refreshed and confident and able to move on if she had the chance for some rejuvenating pampering she could never afford on her new budget.

Thanks for considering my mom, Janie, for this contest. Even if she doesn’t get your vote, I hope you’ll think of her in your prayers.  Submitted by: Abbie

Tags: , , ,

346 Responses to “Entry for Janie”

  1. Rhonda says:

    Janie definitely has my vote!

  2. Aubrey says:

    She’s got my vote :)

  3. Jane says:

    GO JANIE!!!!

  4. Zachary L says:

    Get it Janie! You deserve this!

  5. Zach says:

    Janie, you deserve this!

  6. Kelli says:

    Abbie, I hope your mom gets this – It sounds like she really deserves it.

  7. Abby F says:

    Janie has my vote!

  8. Ann C says:

    Janie gets my vote. Ann Campbell, Hanover, class of ’70

  9. Sammy says:

    Janie, you have my vote :)

  10. Ginger says:

    Go Janie! :D

  11. Sara says:

    Janie has my vote!

  12. Robert says:

    Heidi has my vote

  13. Margaret says:

    What an inspiring story! Thanks for sharing it!

  14. Izzy P. says:

    This sounds like it’d be perfect for such a hard-working woman! Good luck!

  15. Windermere says:

    She has my vote. :)

  16. Susan Keene says:

    Janie has my vote…What a great human being!

  17. Jessie says:

    janie has my vote!!

  18. Lisa says:

    Janie is a very special person and I agree with Abbie that she never thinks about pampering herself……she is such a giver and I would love for her to actually receive something so special for Mother’s Day……no one deserves it more than Janie.

  19. Makenna says:

    Janie has my vote!

  20. Bridget says:

    Janies got my vote….God Bless!

  21. Diane Snow says:

    I admire Janie for her strength, compassion and kindness. I vote for Janie and hope you win!

  22. Melissa says:

    I would like to vote for Janie. She has endured a lot emotionally yet has never lost focus of her role as loving mother and mother-in-law to Abbie, Caleb, and Hillary. Behind every great family is a great woman. It is for this reason that I hole heartedly vote for Janie.

  23. Anita Tyler says:

    Janie has my vote!

  24. Jill says:

    Janie has my vote!

  25. Katie says:

    Janie’s got my vote! There’s no one who deserves this more than she does, with all she has been through!

  26. Jordan says:

    I just found out about this and am so excited Janie’s been nominated. Good luck!

  27. Laura Brockman says:

    Definitely has my vote! I hope you win! :) Sounds like you deserve it!

  28. Sandra says:

    Janie gets my vote! Such an inspiring story! I hope this helps her feel better and that it is the start of a positive recovery.

  29. Carla Huntsman says:

    What an amazing woman! A true inspiration! Definitely deserving of this spa treatment. She has my vote, no question about it.

  30. Alan Huffman says:

    I can’t think there could be a person more worthy of such a great reward, although Janie would not echo that sentiment. ‘ Just another reason she deserves it. Add one more to Janie’s vote total, please.

  31. Tabitha says:

    Janie’s got my vote! Good luck! She’s the perfect person for this gift. God Bless!

  32. Elyse says:

    Janie has my vote!

  33. Lauren says:

    Janie gets my votie! What a great story on its way to a happy outcome!

  34. Janie :) says:

    This other Janie TOTALLY deserves the spa treatments. She is such a wonderful, inspiring person for us all! My vote is obvious.

  35. Kevin Brennan says:

    Janie deserves three votes from me, and it’s not just because I’m marrying somebody named Janie…

  36. Andrew Christianson says:

    Janie has my vote. She put up with Caleb for >20 years. For that alone she deserves to spend the rest of her life being pampered.

  37. Eric says:

    Another vote for Janie!

  38. Byungguk Kim says:

    My vote here!

  39. HuggDur says:

    Janie should win!

  40. wei xu says:

    加油.

    life can be hard, sometime you cannot choose. feel and learn to enjoy every bit of it. Hope you win.

  41. Kristyn says:

    Janie has my vote!

  42. Lauren says:

    Janie gets my vote!

  43. Eric says:

    Janie gets my vote!

  44. Lynne says:

    What a deserving person. There is even more to the story shared by Abbie and Janie serves as an inspiration to so very many and has touched many lives. She deserves only the best.

  45. michelle s says:

    janie’s got my vote!

  46. Ann says:

    Janie has my vote, what a lady!

  47. Trevor says:

    Got my vote!

  48. Jeff says:

    I agree, she deserves it. You have my vote.

  49. Traci says:

    My vote goes to Janie! What a heart-warming story and one amazing woman. It’s time you received some pampering! :)

  50. Matt says:

    Janie gets my vote!